Newsletter #9: Family and Skip Intro Anniversary!
A reflection on familial obligation
I write to you from the candy cane striped couch at my grandparents (now passed) beach house on Long Beach Island, New Jersey.
I grew up spending a week or two of my summers here every year while my grandparents were alive.
Long Beach Island hosts mini golf, a small amusement park, the best old fashioned donuts you’ll ever have, and ocean waves so violent they have traumatized many a child (hi).
Yet, the good memories of my stays here are few and far between. It’s only now as an adult with agency that I’m able to enjoy myself here.
The Klein traditions were similar to my experience of Jewish tradition in that “we do things this way, you don’t need to know why, and you don’t need to want to, but it is important we do things this way.” I was told my grandparents loved me very much, and that was reason enough for all the familial obligation and begrudging traditions that I would practice throughout my childhood.
I was the youngest of my cousins by a fair margin, and it basically felt like being a new character in a TV show in it’s 5th season. I had missed most of the formative events that created closeness between my cousins and between my cousins and grandparents. My cousins doted on and confided in my grandparents in a way that bewildered me, because they had bonds with versions of my grandparents that I would just never know.
I didn’t get the chance to know my Poppop before he had hurt his head, leaving him less of the gregarious man my mother and my cousins would tell me about. I didn’t know the Grammy that had been active in her grandchildren’s lives. I knew the one who chided my grandfather for sitting down, gave me books for my birthday (I used to hate to read), and who made fun of fat people.
I spent my summers here bored, anxious, and hungry.
I do believe they tried to get to know me. But it’s so hard to share parts of yourself when you feel too young to be included and like all of your interests aren’t the “right” ones.
I never understood the “just do it because you’re supposed to” of relationships with family.
And now I spend time here. Making good memories with my partner, Robert, eating what I want, doing what I want. And making new and good memories with my family members as an adult too. But all of which, in a house once owned by people who reportedly loved me but who I never really knew.
And I don’t get the chance to introduce myself again. As someone with agency. To create traditions that are within my control and that actually feel purposeful to me with my grandparents.
It sounds like I would have loved my Poppop. And although I’d hide a lot of my life from my Grammy, I bet she would have loved talking to Robert about books, and watching that would have made me happy.
And now do their spirits feel the same obligatory love for me they did when I was a child? Do their spirits share this space with us just because “it’s what they’re supposed to do?” Is it fair for me to take up space here knowing how ungrateful I was for it when my grandparents were alive?
I feel like I take advantage of their sense of familial obligation in a way that I never paid it forward.
That’s pretty fucking bleak.
OR
If I were to give my grandparents more credit, and attribute to them a bit more empathy, maybe they are happy seeing me finally spending time at this house happily, in the way they had always hoped I would.
Maybe they know how grateful I am now and don’t hold how I felt and behaved when I was a child against me.
Maybe they’re happy to see me bring someone here with me who loves me so much and so well.
And perhaps to think that they think kindly of me, is a better way to honor them.
What’s Going On?
Skip Intro: The Reunion
It’s bat shit bonkers that I’ve been friends with and performing improv with this group of individuals for almost 5 years.
Last weekend we celebrated Hunter’s wedding and guys, she looked so beautiful you’d literally throw up.
We are teaming up with Pretty Funny Comedy to produce our “5 Year Reunion Show,” where Skip Intro will join back together “for the first time in decades!”
We’ll have stand up by Mackenzie Jaquish and Nora Schmitt, and improv from Robert Price and friends.
This Saturday! Tickets here!
A Night of Stories
My lovely friend Liv Vordenberg is hosting a Moth style night of story telling for her birthday! I’ll be one of many participants telling a story on the theme of “Transform.” It’s such an inventive idea, I know it’ll be a lot of fun.
Writing Fan Fiction/Smut
I’ve been just giddy writing my current long form fan fiction. It’s the first time in decades that writing has literally just been pouring out of me and I just have to be quick enough to get it all down. I’ve been totally dissolving into the world of my story and getting so excited to build character arcs and lay groundwork for narrative pay offs. I feel like I’ve learned so much from all of the anime I’ve watched recently about creating depth to characters I love and I’m so excited to use those skills.
I’m trying to decide how I want to share it with people. I’m considering making another social media account specifically for writing? Perhaps another substack?
Are you interested in reading and/or writing your own? Talk to me about it!
Stuff to Check Out
Events
Vibe Check: A Community Collective Happy Hour - OutsmartNYC presents a community building event to discuss ways to make nightlife spaces safer in NYC. August 9th 8pm, at Mood Ring.
Japan Fes - A vibrant celebration of Japanese culture in New York! When I went I had some of the best food I have ever had in NYC. I got Okonomiyaki, fried ice cream, and matcha, I still salivate when I think about it. Multiple times and places throughout the summer!
Classes
Level 1 Improv at the PIT - Taught by my Level 1 teacher and very good friend Dana Shulman! I took Dana’s class 7 years ago, omg. Highly recommend Dana for people new and nervous to improv!
Podcasts
Our Anime Show Podcast - Fellow anime nerds and best friends Alli Green and Gio Patrick discuss all things anime. You can even find their episode with ME on it, from when I first entered my anime renaissance this year. Available wherever you get your podcasts.
Short Stack Podcast - Each Monday, your very talented hosts Liv Vordenberg and Jackie Meissner share short stories with complete soundscapes that transport you into a new fictional universe every week. Available wherever you get your podcasts.
Open Mics
Sam and Friends - A warm and welcoming open mic where our priority is community and belonging. Poetry, music, storytelling, & more! Hosted by the wonderful Sam Theuring. Tuesdays, sign up is at 7pm at Roots Cafe.
Drunken Shakespeare - The Night Shift Theatre Co presents open mic style Shakespeare! Come watch or perform! 3rd Monday of every month. Sign up at 8pm at Jake’s Dilemma.
Shows
Scubchella - An all night improv extravaganza presented by the hilarious team Scubsy with dope backyard summer show vibes. August 12th 4pm at The Grotto BK.
Cheeky Sketch Show - A sketch show for all asses that celebrates being human and all that comes with it. August 13th 7:30 pm at The PIT Loft.
Energizer Honeys - The dynamic comedy hosting duo is making their Little Field debut! Hosted by very funny best friends Delia Kemph and Nell Kessler. August 29th 8pm at Littlefield.
What I’m Loving
Sasaki and Miyano
I cannot recommend this manga and anime enough. It’ll set your heart ablaze and it continues to bring me endless joy. I highly recommend the dub.
The Ultimate Guide to Witchcraft: A Modern-Day Guide to Making Magick Anjou Kiernan
This is the first book I bought when I made my return to learning about Witchcraft! I’ve been making my way through it very slowly and I really think it’s a great primer for anyone looking for a place to start. Covers most of the major topics and gives a good jumping off point to learn more based on what interests you most!
Novas Adventures on Tiktok
I love their voice and the whimsy they bring with them as they explore nature!
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